Soon....

Ever since late December of 34th week pregnancy, I was in a slight danger of premature labor. The baby is really trying to getting out. It is pretty scary feeling it might come down any moment when I am picking up 2 gallons of milk jugs at Costco. My movement is as slow as a turtle. I finally learned to drive a scooter shopping cart at the grocery store.

Anyway, he is coming out tomorrow. I am nervous again for everything. Can I really go through labor? Can I wake up and nurse every 2-3 hours? Can I even be able to love him as equal as Amalie? How do I clean boy's bottom? Is he going to grow up to be a clean and neat guy? Not stink? Are Amalie and him going to be good friends?????? Endless. My bad habit.

34週ごろから早産になりそうで、早一月。どうにか持ちそうです。といっても、38週で明日生まれることになります。双子だったら（実は始めは双子。）どうするの？私の動きもかめさん並にゆっくりで、先日ついに食料品店の電動車椅子を使用。もっと、早く堂々と使っていればよかったわ。それにしても、いくら医療任せの無痛出産とはいえ、不安は募るばかり。また、子宮破裂したらどうしよう、2,3時間おきに起きて授乳できるのか、海璃と平等に愛せるのだろうか、男の子のオシメはどうやって変えるのだろう、彼はきれい好きにそだってくれるのか、海璃といい関係を築いていけるのだろうか・・・エンドレス。取り越し苦労な悪い癖。

PS:

Amalie is very excited to see a baby boy. She is also excited about everything that the baby needs, and trying them on/in. Look at this video. She knows she is doing something bad that I kept telling her not to do, so she doesn't even ask for help.

海璃はというと、ベイビーボーイの誕生をものすごく楽しみにしていて、赤ちゃんグッズも自分でお試ししなきゃ気が済まないらしく、こんな事になってしまいました。だめよ、と言われていた事をしている悪い自分に自覚があるらしく、助けも求めない彼女。